**Chapter 18: "Shattered Ideals"**

I was on the floor. Literally. The cold stone of the temple pressed against my cheek, a grounding sensation in a world that had suddenly gone completely bonkers, and downhill from bonkers no less!.

I could hear the hum of the corrupted Soul Weaving, feel the vibrations in my bones. It was like… like a discordant symphony played on instruments of pure wrongness.

The weight of it all pressed down on me. Gods, Demons, secret societies, ancient temples, Keala slowly ripping apart the kingdom… It was too much. Way too much. Even for someone who sold their soul for revenge. I couldn't move. Couldn't think. Couldn't even feel the impending doom of Azazel claiming my soul. Hell, at this point, that was almost welcome. Almost.

Seraphina… She was still standing, but barely. I saw her out of the corner of my eye, swaying slightly, her face pale, bruised and bleeding. She opened her mouth to say something, but no sound came out.

I heard Keala scream, and felt reality tear another hole apart. What even the hell?

It's funny, isn't it? You spend your whole life trying to control things, plotting, scheming and strategizing, and being a dumbass in general. And then you end up flat on your face, completely powerless to stop the inevitable, all the while having to be present and watch the world fall apart.

"Elias," Seraphina finally managed, her voice a raspy whisper. "We... we have to do something." She was probably right. I’d probably agree with her in 30 minutes or so.

Do something? What could *I* possibly do? I was a mage with a death sentence, no allies (except for a banished schollar), and an utter inability to comprehend all of that high magic, soul weaving shenanigans.

I stayed on the floor, too tired to do anything.

"I...I failed, Sera," I mumbled, the words tasting like ash in my mouth. "I thought I could... I don't know... stop this. Save myself, maybe. But I was wrong. So damn wrong."

She reached out, her hand hovering hesitantly over my shoulder. I knew she wanted to help, but there *was* no help. “It… it doesn’t define you.” What does she even know about me? If I had the powers of that Soul Weaver or that God of Souls… the God I barely saw in dreams.

I brushed the dust off my robes. “Did I have any choice?”

Then again, why should I even care? Now that it was out, they were free. I was fine. Hell, I would probably be dead in a month or so. Then, that was it. Did it even mattered?

Keala wasn't listening. Of course she wasn't. Honestly who would after seeing all of that?

She was standing in the center of the temple, her eyes glowing with that eerie, unnatural light. The symbols of the God of Souls pulsed, and the air crackled with raw power. It felt like a storm was brewing inside her, a chaotic maelstrom of divine energy.

It was… mesmerizing. And terrifying. More than Azazel was (and trust me, that was a high bar).

She raised her hands, palms up, as if conducting some cosmic orchestra. I could feel the shift in the temple, and the world. It was subtle at first, like a change in air pressure, or a slight shift in the earth. But it was growing, building, becoming something… else. “I can fix it all.”

We needed to go. The both of us needed to go. I didn’t told Sera. I couldn’t find any voice. I just needed to fix it.

The noble's words echoed in my mind: *'Using Soul Weaving weakens the barrier further, risking a demonic invasion if left unchecked'.*

Keala was playing with forces she didn't understand. I didn't understood them. At no point could I say that I knew what and how and what I was exactly doing every day. And that, was the scariest part of it all.

I saw the air flicker around her, the edges of reality blurring and warping. It was like watching someone paint over a masterpiece with mud.

"Keala, stop!" Seraphina yelled, her voice filled with fear. "You don't know what you're doing."

But she didn't stop. Couldn't stop, even. The power was flowing through her, consuming her. She was a puppet dancing to the tune of something ancient, something dangerous.

I tried to stand, but my legs were like jelly. I could barely lift myself off the ground. I felt weak, useless, utterly defeated. I could barely feel anything. And I did not knew if those feelings were the one.

"What does that even changes, if this is the case?" The words came out of my mouth without knowing. I didn't knew I was talking, or even trying to. And it was loud. Louder than even I can imagine. The change in pressure in the room, the weirdness in this room, all of it faded the moment I said, and even realized about it.

Keala turned to me, her eyes wide, confused and hurt, the glowing light dimmed. "What?" she asked, her voice trembling.

I forced myself to stand, ignoring the pain in my body. I walked towards her, slowly, carefully, like approaching a wounded animal. Seraphina stayed put, staring. Even while being this beat up, Sera's aura was scary. If I was a weird person, I would have already ran away... if there were exits of course.

"What does this changes if this will happen?" I repeated, my voice now stronger, filled with a desperate urgency. "Are you even listening to what I'm asking? I'm asking, what are you doing?"

"I was going to fix it," Keala said. "I need to." Tears streamed down her face, mixing with the fading glow on her cheeks. "Every body has been trough worse thing. All of them, including the god. I can fix this." What the hell was that? It was almost as if...

But her argument stopped.

But it's impossible for the god to change everything without the consequence. It's weird to hear that.

“But what will happened to humanity?” She was confused. So I continued.

I grabbed her hand (almost instinctively), and looked directly in her eyes. “But is doing this really saving?" I touched my wrist. "My time already has been decided. If death comes to me, I will embrace. But killing innocents just to save all of the people? Tell me."

I felt the temple hum again, as the question shook Keala. So it had. She hadn't seen it that way. To her, it was either one extreme or other. But not more.

That makes it sadder. What I should even do is to stop it. How can it be stopped?

Keala didn't say anything for a long minute, her eyes darting back and forth between mine and Seraphina's face. I waited for her. Ready to hug her, or slap her face to see if she was still there. Ready to yell and never see the world again. All of it.

"I...I don't know," she finally stammered, her voice barely audible. "I... I just wanted to help. To make things right."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. That damn high noble was right. If this continued, the balance between all of it was going to come undone. I have a choice.

"Tell me. Keala. Does it even see the bad parts? If you are not. Then please for the love of this world. I don't want to be alone, fighting it." I grabbed her shoulders and shakes her with pure strength. "We don't need to erase ourselves. Do you wish to kill more? Does a soul less matters for you?"

Seraphina stepped forward, placing a hand on Keala's arm. "The ends never justify the means, Keala," she said gently. "You can't sacrifice some to save others. It's never that simple.”

Keala seemed to shrink in on herself, the power fading from her eyes, the symbols dimming. I felt the tension in her body release, as she finally accepted that she was wrong, or at least that I was right, although I have no fcking clue about it.

But even now, deep inside... I did wanted to win. To get revenge. And all of it.

I released her, stepping back. "It's okay," I said, my voice softer now. "It wasn't your fault. It was mine. I dragged it all in."

"We all did," Sera said. "It doesn't even matter if what we want will never come to be anymore. I hate this."

She was close. But everything changes.

With those words everything stopped pulsing, all of it returned to normal. It was as if no one did know about our position. Now there was nothing else from it that mattered.

The world has stopped? But no! Keala started moving her hands. Keala was laughing! As always. As that friend of my friend from my childhood. She was going to change it to something new. “If it’s like this I will change all of it! All must feel justice!. Everything must be solved. Death to any one! The world doesn’t matter.”

And again, Keala’s power was unleashed. God dammit.

“Oh no," Sera whispered. I have no voice left to yell.

I needed to stop her. But it was too late. Keala was already gone, consumed by power, the temple echoing with her chaotic energy. I had one chance. Everything was gone.

"Someone must stop her, as soon as they can because she might be gone." I said. Even if it means fighting that person. As dumb as this concept gets. I have to. If not, I won't have any reason to stop her.

I felt a surge of adrenaline, banishing the despair that had crippled me so completely. I didn't know how I was going to do it, but she was in full control mode. A dumb and weird control mode, even. A voice.

Even while all the temple shook, I had to concentrate and concentrate. What now? What can I even do? If I even die, will it matter? Hell, what do I even want?

Then, I knew. Not just those whispers became shout. In that moment I knew. I must do what I can control. If it's the fate to stop it, stop this. As the same people should have stopped me back then.

But the world around us shifted again, as if a kaleidoscope lens was twisting and turning. I didn't know what it means, but nothing seemed what it was anymore. Power was going to all, but if I didn't stop the world would have never seen daylight. It all seemed as a final good bye.

I had to do this. If not, everyone was wrong about me. Everything was wrong about me, and hell. I am even more sad about it. The circle should have never started.

I look direct to Seraphina's eyes. "Protect. Me. We are doing the spell. Now"

Even while the worlds shifts, the demonbrand pulsates, it was clear that what I needed to do. If not, I should die. I am going to put an end to this.

And for that, closed my eyes. The light was so high that if it was not what I had to do and should do, I would never even know where to start. If I never have known where to star, then hell if I knew if I did the right one.

But the sensation of knowing kept burning inside me.

The world and the light must be saved first. No matter what. ***